Wednesday, July 15, 2009

Breaking News: Lobsters' Plans Thwarted

NPR has reported that one Anthony Jones has been sentenced to four years in prison for stealing 91 lobster tails from Bally's Atlantic City casino.

Morning Edition's Renee Montagne puts it all in perspective when she reminds us that the lobsters were "not so lucky, either; the twelve hundred seventy-five dollars' worth of seafood was destroyed."

And isn't that the real crime here?

All those weeks (months?) languishing in Bally's famed tanks, amassing their lucrative flesh, awaiting their lives' culmination! And then… And then it all comes to nothing! They go unbought and—far, far worse—uneaten by casino patrons.

Never have lobsters been so wronged!

1 comment:

Becci said...

"...not so lucky, either; the twelve hundred seventy-five dollars' worth of seafood was destroyed."

Holy crap, that's stupid, and oh-so-appropriate for this blog. Those poor lobsters, having to be destroyed instead of getting eaten. Sigh.